The Horrors Of SEO Mismanagement

So you want to hear a scary story for Ol’ Hallow’s Eve? 

I’ve got a few tales that’ll give you the chills. 

Just don’t blame me if you end up sleeping with the light switched on tonight. 

Follow me into the SEO crypt. 

I hope you’re not too afraid of the dark… 

  The Horrors Of SEO Mismanagement

Delve into the underworld of SEO mismanagement and permit us to tell you how to survive the night. 

Let us guide you through the potential horrors of blog writing and point you in the right direction. 

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The Sixth Sentence 

SEO Dangers of fecklessness

Don’t think because you’ve included a few measly sentences that you can get away with posting  eerily empty blogs.

In fact, the only thing scarier than an empty blog post is that tall dark figure standing behind you.  


There’s nothing worse than a blog with no spirit (and no we don’t mean the fun kind of spirit – tequila). 

It’s no good producing blogs that are as ethereal as Casper the Friendly Ghost. Nobody likes Casper. Not even Casper likes Casper. Everybody ghosts him. 
Blogs should be full of content. Anything less than 1500 is one head short of a horseman. 

(I’d like to apologize in advance for the pun that’s coming up.)

Like a ghost you’re going to have no body… hanging about your site. 

Steer clear of content as empty as an abandoned house, on a hill, on the outskirts of town, next to a spooky forest, near the satanic church. I think you get the picture, it’s scary.

There are consequences for the bottom of your page laying textless and as white as a cartoon specter. Lackluster blogs will make your search rankings plummet. 

Finding your site on search engines will be just like when you hear a knocking in the middle of the night and you know that there’s something out there but you just can’t see it.

A Hunger For Regular Content

SEO Mismanagement and its consequences

Do your blogs suck as hard as Nosferatu after waking from a long slumber? 

Are you feeling stuck like a steak in the heart when thinking about how many blogs you should post?  

Does the thought of having to keep up with your blog posts drive you batty? 

If you think uploading one or two posts every now and then is good enough for SEO, then you would be wrong.

One blog post ahaha. Two blog posts ahaha. Three blog posts ahaha. 

Make sure your site oozes with frequent content to satiate the algorithm’s vampiric hunger. 

Not keeping your site up to date with fresh content is like a stake to the heart. It’ll send your search engine ranking position 10 feet under. 

Keep your blog page full-bodied like a fine glass of blood, er…I mean wine.  

Overindulging your site with posts can be just as detrimental as starving it. Bloating  your website with too many posts in one go is a more effective way to kill your site than sunlight to a ghoul, or the bright rays of honesty to Hilary Clinton. 

Spamming useless posts will have potential visitors running faster from your site than a vampire from garlic.

Making A Monster

The dangers of SEO mismanagement

Why don’t you come up to the lab, and see what’s on the slab?

Have you heard about the website that produced too much trash content? 


Neither have we. 

It’s probably dismembered somewhere deep in the bowels of Google’s (or Bing’s) search results. 

Want to know the secret to bring your blog to life? 

The perfect monster is well crafted.

The perfect monster is well thought through.

The perfect monster is unique. 

Original content will always hit the heights of scientific breakthroughs. Whereas, useless posts should be left to rot. 

With all the right pieces you should be able to create a post that is no monstrosity. 

We can help you create something that you’re proud of. We can also help bring your SEO and leads back to life. 

Yes, yes master, your creation is almost complete

Just like a mad scientist your aim should always be on quality. Producing many blogs with little value will go against your search engine rankings. 

Blog Of The Living Dead

SEO Mismanagement

Brains brains brainssssssss…

Don’t be a mindless zombie, use your brains to create quality content. 

There’s nothing natural about the undead. It’s our responsibility to stop the spread of the digital zombie plague running amok in the virtual world.

Duplicate blogs have infested the internet like zombies in a 1970s shopping mall. 

Resurrecting old content is a lot like raising a zombie from the grave, nothing good can come from it. Blogs that aren’t aimed or optimized correctly will be left to stumble aimlessly, without gaining much attention from the audiences that you’re wanting. 

Search engines are wise to the ways of producing zombies and they can really punish you for it. 

Cannibalizing your own content might seem like an easy way to produce more blogs but in the long run you’ll be sending your website to an early grave. 

Plagiarism is another form of duplicated content. Not only will this kill your blog, it’s also categorized as a black hat technique which can lead to your site being blacklisted. 

Originality is your key to survival amongst the vast hordes of online zombies. 

The Silence Of The Keywords

Prince Andrew

Does the thought of maintaining healthy SEO sound like bloody murder to you? 

We know it can be scary thinking about how to manage your site and the subsequent traffic. 

There’s a lot of terrifying stories surrounding the frequent abuse of keywords. Blogs that try to manipulate search engines through key word abuse can feel like reading the writings of a serial killer. Or an invoice from Alec Baldwin. 

In fact, keyword manipulation is a sure fire way to have your search result listing running further away than the final girl in a slasher flick. 

Search engines can even blacklist your site if you’ve been keyword stuffing. Unlike Jason or Freddy, your site won’t be able to easily bounce back from SEO death. 

The aim of a good web page is always to make visitors want to stay. You want your site to be as inviting as a 5-star hotel, unlike the Bates motel or The Overlook.

The aim is to keep your site informative, useful, and concise. Keywords shouldn’t be overused but they should be splattered throughout. Splattered like the blood of one of Mike Myers (not Austin Powers!) unfortunate victims on Halloween night.

Possessing The Right Links

SEO Mismanagement

Links may not seem like much, but for search engine optimization the devil is in the details. 

You don’t need an Ouija board to tell you the answers that you’re looking for. We’re right here with the facts.  

The way to a successful blog is through healthy links. Search engines will prioritise sites with useful and relevant backlinks. 

Search engines (like Google) treat links to unstable or low quality sites like they’ve fallen victim to demonic possession. The solution for search engines is to exorcise these bad results from the first few pages of their listings.

Healthy links are an omen of a good website. Links should be included within the main body of the text and be directed towards reputable sites. 

By using appropriate links, you’re showing search engines that your site is a worthy source for citations. It also means that other people will have more of an incentive to link back to your webpage, conjuring up greater amounts of organic traffic.

The more effective your links the higher up your search engine ranking. You don’t need a priest to bless your web page when you can boost your rankings with reliable and reputable links. 

Brewing A Potent Potion 

The horrors of SEO mismanagement

Eye of newt, and toe of frog, technical errors make for a terrible blog. 

When you’re concocting your website make sure you have all the right ingredients in your virtual cauldron. 

One bad bit of coding or a stray technical error can send your site spiralling in terms of search engine rankings. 

There are a few things that might purely seem like bad luck – like walking under a ladder or breaking a mirror. You might be surprised to hear it, but your site loading slowly isn’t based on luck. 

Coding your site is like carving a pumpkin, one slip-up and you risk the integrity of the whole thing.

A site riddled with technical errors can slow down the load rate meaning it can feel like centuries before you get to the stuff you really want to see.  

You don’t need a crystal ball to witness where we’re going with this one. The slower the site is to load, the higher the bounce rate before the page even loads up. 

Who You Gonna Call? 

SEO Mismanagement

It can seem daunting trying to avoid these SEO traps. We know how to make sure that by the break of dawn you’re alive to tell the tale. 

If our seven spooky stories have given you the goosebumps then start by getting in touch now

SEO can seem like an overwhelming task and we don’t want you to fall victim to unnecessary stresses.

We know that delegating blog writing and maintaining your site’s SEO can cause avoidable workplace tension (or even murder).


Johnathan Elliott

Johnathan Elliott

Johnathan joined the DRPT family in 2021, having gained his Masters Degree in English studies with Manchester University (yes, Manchester has a University). Besides bringing excellent writing, research, and communication skills to our team, Johnathan is a keen film fan. When asked what he would do if he won the lottery, Johnathan replied: "I would make the world's worst horror film". Yes. We worry for him, too.

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About The Author

Johnathan Elliott

Johnathan joined the DRPT family in 2021, having gained his Masters Degree in English studies with Manchester University (yes, Manchester has a University). Besides bringing excellent writing, research, and communication skills to our team, Johnathan is a keen film fan. When asked what he would do if he won the lottery, Johnathan replied: "I would make the world's worst horror film". Yes. We worry for him, too.